Sunday, December 27, 2009
Could They Have Been Saved?
As the year comes to a close, I think about the ones we've lost. I've lost more friends this year than any other year. Some to cancer, heart attacks, and yes, suicide. Just from my small town, there were 3 people I knew that took their own lives this year. Now, I don't know their stories... when it comes down to it, they're the only ones who knew what they were dealing with and what led them to that point. But I believe depression definitely played a part! Depression is a killer! No, we don't like to talk about suicide. But if a small town can have that many suicides, think about the rest of the world. Just this morning I read online that a musician died Christmas day of suicide. It's real... it seems to be happening more and more. So could they have been saved? Did they feel like they couldn't talk to anyone about it? Is depression such a taboo subject that they were ashamed to let anyone know they were dealing with it? If they were able to talk to someone about it, would it have made a difference? If they did talk to someone about it, why didn't it make a difference? I don't know the answers to these questions. I just know that I'm dealing with it and I'm trying to fight this killer... and I don't want anyone asking about me... "Could he have been saved?"
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I don't know the answers but I wonder about them too.... when I was in my darkest point I called the only one I knew who could get me to do what was needed and she was there. Why did I reach out? Did they reach out and get voicemail? I feel like it was the Holy Spirit that reached out for me but that leads to the question "why me? and not them".... I battle it too, my friend. not proud of it but not as ashamed as I once was either. it's hard to keep being strong and not give up but I am like you, I don't want that question asked about me. - Sheila
ReplyDeleteoh yeah, and then there was the time I called the suicide hotline and no one answered..... Sheila
ReplyDeleteI have read, in-part, a book called Depression: The Mood Disease by F. M. Mondomore. It has some good information and treats Depression as you said like a disease. We do need to become aware of this and quit closing it up in the closet because it takes the most precious of lives...the ones that would never take themselves away if it weren't for a true disease. As I think about my Dad, I truly wish I would have been more prepared to deal with him, some days it was so hard to even talk to him because I felt that I was making no progress. In my counseling classes we find that there are people in counseling who are in pre-contemplative states (they aren't ready for change) and I totally feel that that was the place my dad was. He knew he needed change and wanted it but didn't even have the energy to begin making the journey. I can't say that we could have saved him. If I think like that my days are spent in misery as I try to figure out what I did wrong. But others may be saved if we open up about the disease. I can't remember if you were at his funeral, but I think the pastors did a wonderful job of actually looking at the cause and talking about the issue rather than just pushing it away like so often small towns do. I have heard numerous people say, "our church has had a series of sermons on depression" and I know that my Dad would smile to know his death has brought about some change in the way we view depression. God Bless!
ReplyDeleteYay for you, Danny!!! I think this blog is an awesomely positive step toward helping others and self. Depression is something of a taboo topic, but it seems more taboo for the person who has it, and more misunderstood by those who don't. If this blog continues on as it appears to have started, expressive and informative, I believe it can be a blessing for you and others. I will pray for you to have strength to endure and achieve this goal. God bless you.
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